Uncover the Human
Uncover the Human
Purpose Is Being, Not Doing: Discover Your True Self with Rick Harrigan - RERUN
What does it mean to live a purposeful life? Life Purpose Coach Rick Harrigan knows firsthand the painful disconnect between external success and internal emptiness. After 20+ years in corporate entertainment with all the trappings of the American dream—good money, nice house, white picket fence—Rick found himself profoundly unfulfilled. "I was getting validation from everyone except myself," he shares in this soul-stirring conversation.
Rick takes us on his journey from burnout to breakthrough, describing the moment at age 40 when he realized he couldn't continue living a life that wasn't truly his. Working with a coach helped him shed fears around money and perception, allowing him to define success on his own terms for the first time. This transformation was so powerful that Rick left his corporate career, moved to Colorado, and dedicated himself to helping others find their authentic purpose.
The most enlightening revelation? Purpose isn't about doing—it's about being. "Purpose isn't what you're doing. It's not your job. It's who you are," Rick explains. It's about identifying your core values and living them in every aspect of your life. For Rick, discovering that "fun" could actually be a core value was revolutionary, contradicting his stoic upbringing but perfectly aligning with his natural disposition.
Rick offers profound insights into the process of letting go of old programming. He describes it like creating a new groove in a record—understanding what your old patterns are costing you and envisioning the benefits of living authentically. When someone connects with their purpose, there's an unmistakable energetic shift toward freedom, openness, and joy that emanates from within.
Whether you're starting your career, feeling stuck mid-career, or simply seeking greater self-realization, this episode offers valuable guidance for anyone wanting to align their life with their authentic purpose. Visit rickharrigan.com to learn more about Rick's coaching and take your first step toward purposeful living. After all, as Rick reminds us, "failure we can do on our own. Success requires support."
Hey there, Christina.
Speaker 2:Hi, we talked to Rick today.
Speaker 1:Yeah, rick Harrigan, that was just honestly a blast to have a conversation. That guy is great.
Speaker 2:Yes, it was a blast. It's a good thing. Fun is one of his top values, because he definitely knows how to bring it into the room.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I can deliver, yeah, you can deliver. Rick is a life purpose coach and, honestly, I don't even think we need to say more than that. It's just so fun.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, Must listen to, must watch and highly recommend to check him out to make sure that life has a purpose and it's not just on autopilot zombied away.
Speaker 1:Very easy to do that, very hard to do it the other way, but so much better.
Speaker 2:Yes, much, much better Enjoy.
Speaker 1:Enjoy. Welcome to Uncover the Human, where every conversation revolves around enhancing all the connections in our lives.
Speaker 2:Whether that's with our families, co-workers or even ourselves.
Speaker 1:When we can be our authentic selves, magic happens.
Speaker 2:This is Cristina Amigoni.
Speaker 1:And this is.
Speaker 2:Alex Colombo.
Speaker 1:Let's dive in. Authenticity means freedom. Authenticity means going with your gut.
Speaker 3:Authenticity is bringing 100% of yourself, not just the parts you think people want to see, but all of you. Being authentic means that you have integrity to yourself.
Speaker 1:It's the way our intuition is whispering. Something deep-rooted and true Authenticity is when you truly know yourself, you remember and connect to who you were before others told you who you should be. It's transparency, relatability, no frills, no makeup, just being Hello. And welcome back to this episode of Uncover the Human. This week we are joined with our guest Life Purpose Coach, rick Harrigan. Welcome to the podcast, rick.
Speaker 3:Thank you, alex, it's great to be here. Thank you, Christina, for having me. I am really excited to chat with you both today.
Speaker 2:Welcome, welcome.
Speaker 1:We are thrilled to have you on. This is a great time of year to be exploring what you do, and I'm going to let you tell a little bit of that story. How did you get into what you do and what are you doing now?
Speaker 3:Absolutely. Thanks, alex, I appreciate that. So my journey to purpose started way back, even as a kid. It's actually instructive as to how I found my purpose. I grew up in New Jersey, very blue collar household, and from a young age it was really impressed upon me Go to college. A few people in my family were lawyers, become a lawyer, get that high paying job, et cetera, et cetera. So college check, moved to Los Angeles to go to law school in California, took a job in media in the meantime, never quite ended up getting to law school, ended up working in corporate entertainment for about 20 plus years doing advertising, sales and biz dev and on the surface, really successful Good money, nice house, white picket fence, american dream all that stuff.
Speaker 3:Internally, exactly the opposite Feeling stuck, unfulfilled, unhappy, dissatisfied, disconnected. And felt like that for a long time, but kept doing it because I just thought that's what I was supposed to do, that's what society tells you to do, that's what my parents wanted me to do. I was getting all kinds of validation from it, from everyone except myself. And so finally, about 20 years in, when I hit 40, I had had enough. I was burnt out just completely, at my breaking point and I realized I need help. Number one and number two I can't live this life anymore because it's not the life that I want to live. So I actually started working with a coach who was kind of a spiritual life purpose coach. I was kind of having a spiritual awakening at the time and he just really helped me shed my fears around money, shed my fears around perception, the old, what will people say, what will people think, and he really just helped me hone in on my values, my beliefs, and really encouraged me to define what my definition of success was for the first time in my life. And going through that process was the most powerful transformative process I've ever undergone. And I came out of that realizing, wow, I want to do this for other people, because I knew firsthand that there were many, many, many other men and women just like me kind of suffering in lives that were not really of their own conscious design. So I quit the job, left Los Angeles I was kind of tired of the traffic and everything that went along with that Moved here to Colorado, got my coaching certification and I knew right away, you know, what I wanted to help people do was to help them find their purpose, because that's what I really did.
Speaker 3:I found out who I was and what I wanted to do with that. So now I help people do the same, whether they are starting their careers, whether they're in the middle of their careers, or whether they just generally want to find their purpose as part of their own self-realization. I help people find their purpose and then channel it into meaningful, fulfilling work that will make them successful, abundant, joyful. The whole kit and caboodle. It is the most satisfying work I've ever done in my entire life. I love it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I love the phrase particularly. I was getting validation from everywhere except myself.
Speaker 3:That tells the story in a nutshell. Yeah, I could really sum that up very succinctly like that.
Speaker 1:I think that's something that's very relatable. I definitely have felt that at many times in life. There's just and I think a lot of people feel that it is the societal like well, you seem to be doing fine, Buy the books, You're doing great, Right. Just something is not connecting. Everyone else is like oh, that seems fine.
Speaker 3:Everything except my soul and my heart and my mind. Some minorly important aspects of the puzzle.
Speaker 1:Been really well, except for that, yes.
Speaker 2:So how did you recognize that the external validation was not aligning with the internal validation?
Speaker 3:Yeah, it was. You know it was a voice that was there very early on, even as soon as I even got my first job. There was this tiny little voice that was just like this isn't really what you want to be doing, but the external validation those voices are so loud and so much easier to digest than that little voice inside sometimes that they drowned it out for years. And then there were aspects of my job and my life that were great. I was going to really nice dinners and movie premieres and taking great vacations, so that also made it a little easier to tamp that voice down.
Speaker 3:But eventually, once that became the norm, that validation's voice became getting lower and lower in volume and my internal sense of misalignment kept getting louder and louder in volume Until finally I just came to this realization of all the nice dinners and all the money in the world is not worth it when this internal voice is not aligned with what you're doing.
Speaker 3:And so it was just kind of this slow, steady rise in volume over the years of just simply, you know, because the more you pay into it, the further and further you get from being able to go back and live the way that voice wants you to live, mortgages, things like that. But eventually the volume just got so loud internally and there were things going wrong in my life externally as well. I was angry, I was unhappy Probably not the most fun guy to be around coming home from work. So there was external discord happening at the same time as well. That energy and that voice it's going to make itself heard one way, shape or form, and some of that external discord helped make me realize, wow, I am really out of alignment and I need to listen to this inner voice and follow what it's telling me to do.
Speaker 1:So you found purpose in helping other people find purpose. What does purpose mean to you?
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 3:Yeah. So the first step in finding your purpose is really understanding what purpose is. And purpose isn't what you're doing. It's not something that you do, it's not your job. It's not the parts, it's the sum of those parts. It's not something that you do, it's not your job. It's not the parts, it's the sum of those parts. It's who you are. It's who you're being, it's who you feel called to be in every moment of your life. It's your values, it's your beliefs, it's how you manifest those and it is, in some part, what you decide to do with them. But your purpose isn't defined by the doing, it's defined by the being.
Speaker 3:I often say, you know, purpose is synonymous with true self, purpose is synonymous with total authenticity, and purpose is just simply being who you really are meant to be called to be and just feel from the wellspring of your soul that you ought to be in this world. It's not an end goal. It's not like you can say, oh, I found my purpose, I'm out, I won. It's a nonstop journey because you're always changing, you're always learning. Your values can change, your beliefs can change, so your purpose changes as you progress through life, and that's the beauty of it. It's the painting that you paint of your life. That's never really done. I guess you could even make the argument until even after you take your last breath. And that's what I really find as the beauty of it is. It's a process that really is life-giving, life-affirming, and really brings joy to the soul.
Speaker 1:That's a great distinction. I like that Purpose as a being not doing. Yeah, that is a great distinction.
Speaker 2:I almost wonder if you could walk us through how to find our purpose in 45 minutes or less.
Speaker 3:I have a couple of rough guideposts.
Speaker 2:Just kidding putting you on the spot.
Speaker 3:I can give you some steps for sure. I'll tell you this Values are really really elementary to understanding one's purpose. Values are really the building blocks of purpose and understanding what your values really are, because they are the guideposts of your life and I do a lot of work with my clients. Three different exercises to define what your roughly four to six core values are and when you can define those core values and you know exactly what they mean to you. And they're very consciously chosen, not fear-based, because we can have fear-based values that don't really serve us. When they're consciously chosen, those values are things we can carry around with us and manifest and live and breathe into anywhere we go around, anyone we meet, anytime and we can't go wrong, and they are really kind of the signposts that triangulate what our purpose really is. They're really core to purpose work.
Speaker 1:Have you mentioned values before?
Speaker 2:on this A few times maybe you know, let's see 50, 60 episodes a few times in each episode, a few hundreds of times. I think, I gleaned that you, Alex, and.
Speaker 3:Christina vibe with values. I dig that. We do, we do.
Speaker 1:I like that distinction of fear-based values too. There's so many assigned values, so many learned values. It's very much like those external voices. There's so many values told to you that should be there, and what is really your values? So I'm curious and you don't have to dive in if it's too personal, but like what your values are. What connects you to the work that you do? What got you into your new purpose?
Speaker 3:Yeah, I can tell you, my number one value is connecting with others. I love when two people can sit there in their authenticity or in their vulnerability and just really connect on that level Like wow, you know, we share some of the same experiences, we share some of the same fears, we share some of the same triumphs, we share the same humanity. I love connecting with people in that it's total flow for me when I'm connecting with somebody or a group of people in that manner. A couple other of my biggies family is a big one, but that one wasn't until my daughter was born and then I really came to understand, wow, this is true family, but that extends beyond just blood as well.
Speaker 3:And actually fun is a really big value for me. And kind of a funny little story about that when I was getting my coaching certification, we were doing some values work and I saw fun on the list of values and I was beside myself. I was like how can fun be value? Like how? How was fun a value? Because I grew up in a very stoic Irish Catholic household where if there's no room for fun in life, you just you live, you suffer, you stay quiet and then you know when you're done. Yeah, sounds great, sign me up.
Speaker 2:You're a sinner by birth. There's nothing you can do about redeeming that, just give it up suffer, suffer, suffer and lights out.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and so I saw this on the list and I asked my facilitator, dina cashman, who's a common friend of ours, I was like that can be a value.
Speaker 3:She was like absolutely, if it brings you joy, if it makes you feel aligned with your soul, absolutely a value.
Speaker 3:And it was like the clouds parted, the sun came out and it gave me permission, because my whole life I've been like just's just kind of this fun loving kid who kind of had to tamp that down and realizing like, wow, fun can be a value and I can like go anywhere and try to have fun, whoa. So doing that values work was some of the most rewarding work that I did because it also gave me permission to be more of myself and shed some of those learned values like stoicism or you know things like that Exactly. Yeah, it doesn't have to be hard, we can have some fun while we're doing it. That was a big aha moment for me and I see that all the time with a lot of my clients where they're just like wow, like this. You know I have this massive list of values and they're like I never even thought of that as a value and you can see them making all these connections and maybe shedding some of those fear-based values and it's amazing work to do.
Speaker 1:That's incredible. I think that's one that a lot of people can probably relate to as well Just the idea that you could. It's the same as like purpose not being what you do, Because we also tie what we do usually to some form of like well, it should be a little painful, it should suck a little bit.
Speaker 2:You're not working hard enough if it's not suffering.
Speaker 1:It's your purpose and it should hurt a lot.
Speaker 3:You're not doing it right. Yeah, where are the scars? I steadfastly disagree with that.
Speaker 2:Thank you, we do too now, but we have the scars anyway From previous lives.
Speaker 3:Exactly From some of those old fear-based values. I still have some of those scars and wounds. No, I wouldn't say wounds, just scars.
Speaker 1:That idea of permission is so prevalent in learning things about yourself, there's so much that we hold back from ourselves because we don't feel like we have permission to express that. You know that's definitely some learned responses, and just taught responses that there's a lot of societal pressure to not have fun. It's just not to do something like that. It's interesting you connect immediately to that idea for mission and I love your description as well. Like the clouds, part of this is something where, like it's this big aha moment, sun washes over you like, ah man, that was it, you can do that.
Speaker 3:Yeah, that's refreshing, wow. Yeah, and in many ways can be ingrained from birth. And then our system is such where, you know, there's this intense pressure on somebody who's 18, 19 years old to figure it all out right now, pick a major, decide what you want to do for the rest of your life, and there's this sort of lack of permission to just explore, to try some different hats on and try different things on. Sometimes, you know, we can find our authentic selves, but sometimes we need to try some different hats on to really see what the ideal application of that is in terms of career or job or starting a business and things like that, and that kind of gets discouraged, that permission gets taken away a little bit at an early age, I think, when people should really be out there just exploring and wearing different hats, trying different things on.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah. I imagine that it's not easy work for anybody to go through and it probably takes quite a bit of creating the space for someone to feel safe and to keep peeling the onion. As a coach, especially after some experience, it becomes pretty clear when somebody is putting up the armor and when somebody is not putting up the armor, and then you know there's a lot of digging to be had and you get to the point where it's like, okay, there's a lot of this has to be on the other side and not from on the coach side of like, if you can't open up and you can't slow down and you can't admit, and you can have that self-awareness there's so far you can go, yeah.
Speaker 3:Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 3:And that's where, well, actually, when I first started coaching, I worked with men for that exact reason, because I saw so many men were kind of suffering in that sense of stoicism, and asking for help is a sign of vulnerability or weakness.
Speaker 3:Having undergone that process myself and knowing how powerful it was, I wanted to try and reach as many men as possible to sort of be like there's another way.
Speaker 3:You know, with those clouds can't part. And that relatability, that aspect of connecting with others and sharing my own vulnerability in my story, and that aspect I think played a big part in disarming or not necessarily disarming, but just creating that comfort level, that ability to connect. And in that ability to connect that's when people can start dealing with those things and turning their gaze inward. And now I work with men and women because I want to spread the gospel of purpose far and wide and help as many people as possible. But there's a lot of rapport building that has to occur there and there's a lot of trust that has to be established for people to really do that vulnerable, open, digging and shine that light on some things that they might not want to because there might be some pain there. That's where those dreams are, you know, in that dark corner, like here I am, here I am, and helping them take down those barriers is all part of the process.
Speaker 1:Especially a portion of it, Would you say, and you guys have both done a lot of coaching. There's a lot of. I've met people I've even heard some pretty funny phrases around it where there's almost like a belief and sometimes almost a pride over feeling like, oh, I'm uncoachable, Like I can't be leeched. I've even heard phrases like, oh, therapy can't handle me, Like almost bragging about it, which is kind of funny.
Speaker 1:And from my perspective it feels like it definitely comes down to personal choice of am I going to be able to open up here, but have you ever really run into a roadblock or feeling like there is something that actually couldn't be moved?
Speaker 3:Not after I've begun working with someone. There are certainly when you're doing a consultation or even just talking to somebody at a party or whatever it may be. There's always some sort of hesitation. You know, from people who maybe haven't been coached before of this I'm a tough nut to crack or I don't need help. I got this or what have you and one of my, Christina, I'm sure you know.
Speaker 2:I have a side note for when you're finishing your thoughts.
Speaker 3:It's funny I have a 13-year-old daughter who sometimes falls into that category. Yeah, one of my favorite sayings that was given to me by one of my coaches is failure we can do on our own. Success requires support, and that I really take to heart. I'll tell people that if you think about your life, you haven't done it on your own. Very, very few people have. It always requires support or teachers, people who know more than you, sharing their knowledge what have you? Or just sharing experience with people.
Speaker 3:So that sometimes gets people thinking like, yeah, this isn't about me preserving some sense of uncoachability or ego or what have you. This is about me being the best that I can be and finding the success that I want to and getting people attached to that. But once people start working with me and I'm sure it's the same with you, christina they're bought in and at that point they're coachable. I guess you could say they are bought into the process and their success and they want it. They're ready to get after it, christina. I mean, they want it. They're ready to get after it, christina?
Speaker 2:I'm wondering if you know you were laughing. I was laughing because I find that the two extremes are the you know I'm uncoachable with pride, as if there is something to be proudful about. And also the other spectrum is and sometimes, unfortunately, it happens even with people that are going through coaching or some form of any external help is the. You go through a concept of you, go through an exercise and you you touch on something. They answer the questions. Whatever it is, you know, you kind of unpack it and it gets to that finish line of like yep, got it next and I'm like okay, the fact that you say you got it means that you really didn't, because there is no getting it in coaching, in self-awareness, in growing Like there's no try. It's kind of like purpose, there's no metal that you get, exactly so whatever finish line you thought you had, that's just you putting a wall up because you don't want to see what's behind it.
Speaker 3:Yeah, absolutely. There's no certificate of completion. It is. It is just gaining more understanding and knowledge and then bravely applying that, staring down those fears and taking down those walls and being willing to move past them, perhaps with some of the tools in the coaching process.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's a wonderful distinction too, because you can logically tell anybody anything and it might totally be true, like, hey, you know, there's a different way to live this. You don't have to be living in shadows or the sky is blue, I don't know what. You can say anything and it's. Everybody can receive that. They can understand the words, they can understand how. Theoretically that would be true, but it is, in my experience, next to impossible to have some revelation and actually have that like really solidify all in like you know 15 minutes somebody can tell you exactly what you need to hear.
Speaker 1:Yes, and you're going to need to still have that time to unwind those habits that led you a different way and rewind new habits.
Speaker 3:Absolutely 100%. I'll hear that a lot is I intellectually like. I get it in that sense of like. You know, I intellectually understand this. It makes sense, I see where this is truth.
Speaker 3:But one of the tenets of our coaching program that Christina and I both went to is that belief is stronger than truth and you have to get to that belief aspect of somebody. What do they believe to be true? And the way to do that is in doing, is in actually starting to live these things that you understand to be true and start living them in your life. You know, and that's where I love coaching and I find the beauty of coaching is it's not just you make it understandable and conceptualized up here you create action, steps and things that people can do in their lives. And it's in the living it, it's in the breathing it, it's in the doing it that it becomes part of the belief. It's like, oh, you know, I tried it and I had this small little victory, so I believe in it a little bit, and you just keep accumulating those small victories until that belief is 100% and it really becomes a capital T truth for them, not just here but in here as well.
Speaker 1:I once read something that said the subconscious needs proof and it's doing those experiments and that's why you have to. You can't just sit and decide like, yeah, I think that's the thing, that's my purpose. There is exploration in that. You mentioned that before. There's the actual exploratory period where you connect to these things, you try these things, because without the proof, something that says, yeah, this, this feels right, that cannot become that capital t truth. I even once heard it referred to as the 18 inch journey. So they measure it at some point, that they think it's about 18 inches from your brain to your heart. Understand it takes a really long time to really work that all the way into the cities yeah, it can sometimes take an eternity or a lifetime.
Speaker 2:Sometimes it never gets there.
Speaker 3:That is really, really true. And that's again, you know, one of the reasons I felt myself drawn to be a coach, because when I was working with a coach and I had done some psychotherapy prior to that, which was incredibly beneficial but I had also reached a point where I was like, okay, I've kind of I've filled these holes in, so to speak. Now, how do I start building? And I need some action steps and some goal setting and some planning, and some really powerful planning at that. And when I was working with my coach, that's what he was doing. It's just like we're going to just keep pushing this ball ahead.
Speaker 3:And the next thing I knew, you know, I had, like I said, quit my job, which had been terrifying to me Three months prior. I was like, if I quit my job, I'm going to end up living under a bridge eating bologna and cheese sandwiches for the rest of my life, and that's it, I'm done, it's all over. It was so binary that the fear was so strong. There I was six months later, quitting the job and moving to Colorado and start enrolling in a coaching program which was all about this accumulation of just these tiny steps coupled with some deeper understanding, and it was pure magic.
Speaker 2:That's awesome. How do you help people, because you've gone through it, and I guess Alex and I have too in some ways. How do you let go of the old self, because that's a very difficult transition because that's a very difficult transition.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so it's important to understand what the old programming or the old belief system or the old values you can use any kind of word there but essentially understand what that old programming is costing you in terms of, perhaps, dreams unrealized, how you're feeling, your energy level, how your life is manifesting, and really understand what is the cost of that old programming and then really create a vision of what can be the benefits of creating some new programming, some programming that's a little closer to home, catering to that inner voice a little more than those outer voices, and paint that picture of what the benefits and what success can look like if you do change that programming. Because there has to be buy-in to want to change it. The easiest way to get a record it's kind of like a groove in a record and your old programming has just got you stuck in that groove and you have to create a willingness to get out of that groove. But you have to create a new groove as well, or else it's just the needle's going to collapse right back into the old groove. So it's the buy-in to want to change that old programming.
Speaker 3:What's the cost? And then the vision of wow, what can this new life look like? You know what's the benefit, and that's when you can start to create those new modes of thinking, new values, new habits, new beliefs, or reconnecting with perhaps some old beliefs that have become misaligned over the course of life. But you have to create that buy-in and that vision of yeah, there is a better way and I'm really attaching to that, rather than this old programming. How about you, christina? How do you approach that?
Speaker 2:Yeah, I really like that. You have to create the new grooves before you can actually change the programming, because without it you're just kind of stuck. What is it costing you is definitely the way to start that journey with the willingness to even admit that there is a cost.
Speaker 2:And so typically when people choose to coach and they stick to it, they have that willingness, they have gotten to that disturbance point, whether it's obvious to them, or maybe one of their family members pointed it out, or something didn't work personally or professionally the way they expected it to. I think it's Tony Robbins that has said that, where you have to be disturbed to change. So what's going to cause that disturbance For me? Actually, not from a coaching perspective, because I was already being coached, but from a purpose perspective and values perspective. I have discovered my values when they were greatly misaligned and I was so disturbed and actually the sentence that I remember made me stop in my tracks and realize that something was off was that I was working on a project that made me miserable, soul-sucking project.
Speaker 2:And after a couple of months in there, my son one afternoon looked at me and asked me he's like mommy, why are you so sad all the time? And that's when it hit me. That's when I realized I am not only sad and frustrated and losing my soul in this, but I'm in it. So I don't see it as that, I see it as like well, it's just part of the journey. You got to work hard, we'll get to the other side, it's all worth it. It's just temporary, whatever it is.
Speaker 2:But when I realized that I was giving that, I was showing that as an example to my children, as in like, this is what you have to look forward to as an adult. That's what disturbed me and I'm like wait, this is not life. This is not the life I want them to think they're going to live as adults. Did they have to live this way and accept soul sucking projects and jobs Because there's no other way out? And so then I started exploring with coaches, with the help of coaches. Why was I so disturbed? What was disturbing me? And one of the things that came up that then has become my I guess my top value is the connections with others, and so I was greatly lacking connections with others, and that was truly making me suffer others.
Speaker 3:And that was truly making me suffer. Wow, yeah, that's powerful and that's again. Those are those values. There's really something there, huh, yeah, yeah. I believed and have that belief has been confirmed time and time again that 99% of the time when we are dissatisfied, disconnected, just feeling off, or stuck and unfulfilled in life, it's a values misalignment. It's when either what we're doing is asking us to really live a value that isn't one of ours, or we're just not getting to live any of our values at all, that people find themselves really just flatlining yeah, and really the flat line, like you guys have said, is sometimes the thing that gets you to bounce on out of it, and sometimes it takes that, most of the time it takes that.
Speaker 1:So otherwise it's just easy to just stay without. Well, I mean, I'm still surviving, yeah, why change this now?
Speaker 3:yeah, it definitely was the case for me where the pain had to reach a point of I can't do it one more day Literally can't do it one more day and actually one of the I was getting to live, the connecting with others value in my old world. The people were wonderful, they were great. It was a really big reason why I stayed in it as long as I did. It was a really big reason why I stayed in it as long as I did. It was all the internal aspects for myself that were just not adding up in the right way and I always had felt called to help people in some way, shape or form. And I wasn't in my old job and I think that's really over the years what was rearing its head getting louder and louder and louder and roaring louder and louder and louder. And I'm just glad I came to it when I did. When I work with my clients that are in their 20s.
Speaker 2:I'm like you're so ahead of the game, isn't it amazing? Yeah, they are ahead of the game, and hopefully you know that means that, as generations move forward, that because there's so many younger people that at least you know younger than I was, they're starting to look for purpose, look for values, demand it I mean, the great resignation is a big demand on my life has to have purpose at work too, not just outside of work, and so that will kind of shift how society runs and some of those older fear-based values may start dying out or have less power.
Speaker 3:Absolutely, I think. Alex, to your point earlier, I think this generation has a lot more permission, or they're not even seeking permission, they're just doing it, which I think is great.
Speaker 2:They're not waiting for permission. Yeah, better way to put it, for sure yeah, when do you recognize when somebody has again not reached the finish line, because there is no finish line but the clouds are parting. What do you recognize in your work with them that you know like, oh, now it's a moment to move into the new groove?
Speaker 3:yes, they've shifted into the new groove. That's a really great question. It's sort of ineffable. It never looks exactly the same for everybody. You know some people are a little more analytical about it, Some people are a little more, you know, right-brained about it.
Speaker 3:But I guess the easiest way to answer that is you can, as their coach, as somebody who's gotten to know them and probably anybody, for that matter, I should say would notice a very discernible shift in just their energy and just how they're showing up in the world, just with more of that sense of freedom and openness and joy and fearlessness. And it's not like it happens overnight, but you can kind of see that progression and then they just kind of hit that tipping point where they'll come into a call and you just get this overwhelming sense that their energy has shifted into. I'm going to be myself and I'm going to channel that into the things, what I would like to do, to create the things that I would like to see. And it's just this energized shift in their presentation, in their lives. I can even if I'm on the phone with a client, I can just feel it coming through.
Speaker 3:That's kind of when you know, that's kind of when they have shifted into that sense of purpose and being. It's amazing. I get such a charge out of it that you know it's why I do. What I do is just that like sense of energy, of that connection, and when you resonate and entrain to that energy, it's absolutely amazing. That's kind of a non-answer, I guess, because there's no demarcation line, it's just a sense, and I'm sure there's people that you meet in life and they just have this certain energy, je ne sais quoi, where it's like, well, yeah, they are really living their true selves and their best lives and they are dialed in Capital L living.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, big time. Living in the moment, being present and just living with joy, just that sense of wow, life is really joyful. And not to be confused with happiness, which is a bit of an external game and can be fleeting. Joy is an inside game and that's something we can always manifest. Maybe that's the best answer when they have that sense of of joy about life I quote joy as an exact game.
Speaker 1:Yes, big time yeah my partner and I went through our photos. It's the last, like five years. It's been a pretty challenging five years and lots of ups and downs, and you can literally see our just general energy like on on some of the upswings, on some of the downswings, and it's, it's all, you know, shot with an iphone. We don't get the benefit of, like you know, the film.
Speaker 3:In films they make choices and there's a whole soundtrack that'll go with it and you're like, yeah, this is the sad time.
Speaker 1:Now you just go through and flick through pictures. You're like, oh no, that was bad, we were not doing well then. And we're you know it's pictures we're smiling, but you can just tell that it's just, oh, that that there's deadness behind the eyes on that one. A lot of times you're connected, you're there, there's actually something happening.
Speaker 3:Definitely, you know, yeah, you can see it's like, oh, the old dinner light wasn't shining its brightest that day. Yeah, and it really is that sensibility of life. Like you know, anything is possible, gosh, it's just great to be me and be alive, like it's just the best sense of the world that you can sense when somebody is really locked into that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so in your personal journey, you got that big moment of permission, especially around the idea of fun, and I would love to know just what are some ways in which you found expressions of fun, even in this week or just recently, or what does that feel like when you? What are expressions of that for you?
Speaker 3:Yeah, I'm a goofball, and so, like having given myself the permission in life to let that inner goofball out, it's just amazing Like we each have our own individual handshakes that are like five minutes long, it's amazing, I don't know how I can even remember anything that complicated these days.
Speaker 3:That's really where it manifests the most. Maybe that's just because I love these people and they love me back. But even with COVID and lockdowns and everything like that, it's just manifesting that sense of fun every day and just knowing like I can bring fun into anything that I do. I could go to an insurance seminar, nothing, you know.
Speaker 3:not that there's anything wrong with that, but it's just kind of as the saying goes I could go to an insurance seminar these days and have a blast and just, you know, be like I want to lock into my value of fun and so I'm going to try and create some fun. And then there's going to be some other people that are like, oh, I like fun too. So let's play this game and you can just create this incredible energetic vibe anywhere. I bring it into my coaching calls. I like to have fun with my clients and we'll wisecrack and just make it a little lighter at times and that might not be for everyone, but I definitely like to coach from my values and that place of fun, but I definitely like to coach from my values and that place of fun so you were talking about this week.
Speaker 3:So my, my wife is. She has a theatrical background, she's an incredible dancer and she kills it at the running man Just rocks it, just pops it. So my daughter and I have been trying to learn the running man and it is hysterical because we stink.
Speaker 3:so we'll have like these little running man competitions, like as we're cooking dinner or something, and just it'll be like my wife, like no, it's like this, and we'll try to do it for like an hour and we just can't get it. It's hysterical and it's just little things like that, just finding these little places where you can do the running man and stink at it and have the best time ever while you're cooking dinner. It's just.
Speaker 2:it's really the little things and just infusing it into you know, those little moments in life where fun for me really comes alive. That's awesome. Well, life is all the little moments, not the big ones.
Speaker 3:Absolutely For sure. How about you guys? Where are you having fun these days, either in your personal lives or with Siamo.
Speaker 2:Well, conversations like these are fun. They're definitely highlight of the week and the day. I was actually on a Nina's clubhouse conversation chat this morning and that was. You know, it's one of those great ways to start the day. So I have some deep philosophical conversation with great people that like to open up and and share their experiences. And, you know, I think the topic today was what's the difference between letting go and avoiding? It's that connection. So it's like, oh great, I get to connect with a bunch of people that I don't actually know or I've heard that for the second time on a clubhouse conversation. That's a lot of fun, I think, with my kids it's a lot of that goofiness as well. You know, we'll play stuff like 80s pop quiz on Alexa on Amazon, and we'll start singing or anything like that and also just like making up stories. Especially when there's a tough moment going on, I'll start talking about something that makes absolutely no sense, just so that the kids can get their mind off of whatever may be really bringing them down.
Speaker 3:It's the little moments yeah, humor is a gift.
Speaker 1:Yes, I think that there's a lot of just like. Being able to do that like this is a great conversation. To be able to like connect and be able to like do you talk about something that's really meaningful to all parties involved. That's always very energizing. And then the fun comes in and being able to joke about these things, being able to talk about like when we found ourselves in, you know, a dead end or something I've had a couple conversations, like recently, where you get that connection with somebody you actually get to talk about.
Speaker 1:you can talk about like difficulties you've had in your life for long times, but you're just with the right person at the right time and you can have these in just joking ways.
Speaker 1:And you're almost laughing at yourself for something that was, at the time, a very painful experience or something. And you have these. And then, just to top it off on just the silliest parts of my day, I have well, currently we're fostering a bunch of cats. We have like six cats in our house right now and we give them personalities and voices that are sometimes just wildly antithetical to what they seem to be doing.
Speaker 1:They're. They're very mean sometimes and they're very like. It's just. It's a great time. You know, every once in a while I get a very alt-right cat and you get a very uh, you never know that it was just something fun to do and we usually do it now nowadays. We've been watching the great british baking show and that is both something you get invested in and simultaneously can only laugh at yourself for getting invested in the absurdity of it.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, I really I love absurdist humor like that. Taking the air out of the seriousness of life or anything like that is always cathartic.
Speaker 1:That's a good reminder. There's a whole perspective out there and humor is one of the few ways to like very quickly connect to that on a visceral level.
Speaker 3:Definitely.
Speaker 2:My seven-year-old left two jackets at school last week and they're still not found. And so, you know, part of the strategy was like, okay, you got to go to lost and found and look for them. I asked him like you know what could help you remember to go to lost and found and look for your jackets? And he was like, oh, I don't know, and you know it's one of those. It's kind of like a grocery store moment the minute you walk into the grocery store, you immediately forget everything you had to, you had to buy, which happens to me all the time and so I just adopted this kind of like cheerleading voice and every 10 or 15 minutes from the night before until I dropped them off from school was like what are we going to do today? We're going to go to the lockdown. What are we bringing home? Two jackets. How are we going to celebrate With donuts? I like it yeah.
Speaker 2:I think like the 20th time of me doing that over a 12-hour period. My son actually looks at me and is like Mommy. That is a great way for me to remember what I have to do today. I'm glad.
Speaker 3:Repetition Exactly, I'm glad. Repetition.
Speaker 2:Exactly.
Speaker 3:Love the repetition. 20 years later, he's going to be like I got a steering committee meeting.
Speaker 1:I'm going to bring a PowerPoint. What are we?
Speaker 2:going to do today? We're going to code software.
Speaker 3:You've got to lock them into that reward. You know what's on the other side A donut. We're going to celebrate with some donuts.
Speaker 2:Little coaching celebration trick.
Speaker 3:Definitely it's the carrot, not the stick.
Speaker 2:It is the carrot, not the stick, it is the carrot.
Speaker 1:Yes Well, this is absolutely a blast to get to do this with you. Rick, thank you so much for joining us. We're thrilled to have you. You got great energy just in general, and this is fun to do. I hope everybody gets a piece of this listening on the outside as well. So we have just a couple of wrap-up questions we'd love to ask you. First of all and this one can be anywhere from a more serious tone to less what does authenticity mean to you?
Speaker 3:Well, authenticity, like I said, is very synonymous with purpose. It's just boldly being yourself. To me, it's not just doing the running man in the kitchen, it's doing the running man in front of a group of 500 people and doing it poorly and having a blast doing it and loving every second of it. So authenticity is doing a terrible running man, no matter where you are or who you are Love that definition, that's wonderful.
Speaker 2:So where can people find you?
Speaker 3:They can find me at rickharrigancom. That's my website. Everything you might need to know about me or working with me or a couple of the other things that I do forest therapy I run a men's group. You can find it all there.
Speaker 2:So rickharrigancom check it out. Perfect, and we'll have it in the show notes, as always.
Speaker 1:Thank you so much for joining Rick. This has been a blast.
Speaker 3:Yeah, christina, alex, thank you so much. I had so much fun. I had no idea I'd be talking about the running man, as what authenticity was? You got to love the twists and turns. But seriously, thank you so much for having me on. It has been an honor and an absolute pleasure. Thank you.
Speaker 2:Thank you, and I do expect to see that running man when we meet in person, oh for sure.
Speaker 3:That's going to be the greeting in the parking lot. I won't be embarrassed, but you'll be embarrassed for me. Awesome, well, thank you. Thank you so much. Yeah, thank you guys so much, really appreciate it.
Speaker 2:Thank you for listening to Uncover the Human a Sciamo podcast.
Speaker 1:Special thanks to our podcast operations wizard, Jake Lara, and our score creator, Rachel Sherwood.
Speaker 2:If you have enjoyed this episode, please share, review and subscribe. You can find our episodes wherever you listen to podcasts.
Speaker 1:We would love to hear from you with feedback, topic ideas or questions. You can reach us at podcast, at weareciamocom or at our website, weareciamocom, linkedin, instagram or Facebook. We Are. Ciamo is spelled W-E-A-R-E-S-I-A-M-O.
Speaker 2:Until next time, listen to yourself, listen to others and always uncover the human.